


sing me a carol

by hwangkill



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Non-Famous, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Break Up, Christmas Eve, M/M, Meeting Again, Post-Break Up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-25
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-02-26 01:49:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,880
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21955420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hwangkill/pseuds/hwangkill
Summary: bang chan wasn’t a simple addition to minho’s lifestyle. he was the total opposite, to be honest; a fire on a chilly day and a rain for the full sun. chan wasn’t anything bad, never would, he actually was making minho the happiest man alive. but good things somehow always lead to bad and as much as minho would want to blame it on the other, he knew the whole fault was actually on his side.or;where famous actor minho meets a street singer chan and all of the memories from their relationship floods down on him.
Relationships: Bang Chan/Lee Minho | Lee Know
Comments: 1
Kudos: 47





	sing me a carol

**Author's Note:**

> hello!! honestly im so anxious about this??? cause its really rushed and theres no plot really but!!! i was writing it between making dumplings and baking a cake cause i wanted to finish it before christmas lmao,, anyways enjoy and comment your thoughts!

minho didn’t hate christmas. at least, he tried to convince everyone (him including) that he didn’t. it wasn’t a pure hate relationship - he just didn’t understand how people could enjoy queuing for hours, tripping over other people at mall and aunt kim asking him when is he going to bring his wife-to-be to the christmas eve table (the case was that he wasn’t, at all, but that’s a conversation for another time). so, clearly shown, minho didn’t hate christmas. in fact, there was a thing he always cherished during that time, it being the peacefulness after everyone was full and tipsy; the political and family related discussions finished. 

minho loved the time when all his nieces rushed to the window to look at the night sky and sing pretty, soothing carols. he loved joining them and feeling all young and free again. it was like a metaphor; like his aging body and soul always remained the same clueless kid at the particular time on christmas eve day. he liked to think about it like that. singing carols always brought so many good memories and reminded him that even when his life is still going and everything changes, the things that he loves stay the same.

now, however he was sighing for the nth time this day when another fashionable mother stomped on his black oxfords with the pretty high heel of their expensive shoes. minho also didn’t understand that and sometimes it made him thank god that he was born a man. was fashion always that hard? he didn’t know but that wasn’t important at that time. he had already spent about three hours in the mall looking for the gifts for all of his nieces, cousins and all the family members that he had spoken to only during the christmas time. he had cursed himself before for buying last minute but the scolding never really brought any sense to his stubborn head. 

maybe it was because he just didn’t appreciate christmas at all and any type of activity connected to that holiday made him roll his eyes and curse like a captain. or maybe he was just lazy.

trying to reach the parking lot, minho heard a voice so similar he had stopped his moves and tried to follow it. fast enough he realized it was a singer sitting in a corner of the huge parking lot; a male with a guitar in his hands and a bucket hat on his head, followed with black bomber jacket and the same color skinny jeans. minho knew that voice. it was so sweet like honey and at the same time harsh and fresh like the first jump to a cold swimming pool water. minho could have sworn he would recognize this voice everytime and everywhere but he couldn’t just believe his ears like that so he took step by step, slowly, as he was finally in front of the imagined person.

the boy was singing a popular christmas song, one of minho’s favorites but at the same time one that minho couldn’t stand the most. however, he couldn’t help but smile when he heard the well known lyrics of _santa baby_. he stood there amazed, as the singer finished and looked up their eyes crossing. and each of the precious memories went down on minho, making his stomach ache and head spin.

  
  


bang chan wasn’t a simple addition to minho’s lifestyle. he was the total opposite, to be honest; a fire on a chilly day and a rain for the full sun. chan wasn’t anything bad, never would, he actually was making minho the happiest man alive. but good things somehow always lead to bad and as much as minho would want to blame it on the other, he knew the whole fault was actually on his side.

—————-

“you know you don’t have to?” said chan raising his eyebrows and somehow smiling behind the worry in his eyes. in front of them was an incredibly fancy restaurant; a huge villa look-a-like building with numerous fairy lights in otherwise empty windows. the parking lot was full of expensive looking cars that chan had never even heard of before and people around them going inside were dressed in suits and pretty cocktail dresses with matching high heels and fake fur coats. to the main entrance led an alley decorated with marvelous crystals between the normal pavement bricks and chan could spot a small garden just beside the building where the covered in snow and ice trees were sparkling so beautifully it looked almost magical and unrealistic. the restaurant was impressive. at least for chan. everything looked so expensive and wonderful and the christmassy aura was like a cherry on the top. he was beyond happy standing hand in hand with the boy he loved and dated for three years already, beside he convinced himself before that for minho he will get used to the fancy life. 

meanwhile chan was taking everything his eyes could catch to himself, minho just shrugged.

“everything best for you” he whispered thinking that the older one couldn’t hear him but feeling a tight squeeze on his hand proved him wrong and made his cheeks warm up and flash bright red. 

“i love you” chan smiled and kissed his boyfriend’s cheek gently, only for a second. minho knew. chan loved to remind him that pretty often while he himself was pretty cryptic with his feelings. 

“let’s head inside before you get ill, you forgot about your scarf again, silly baby” he nagged instead and pulled older’s hand making him move towards the restaurant. 

once inside, they were put to a booth just next to the stage and band. they were nice and chill, minho knew them from the business so he smiled at them while sitting on his chair as him and his boyfriend were scanning the menu with all the fancy dishes.

“minho, what would you like?” chan asked after a minute or two and only then the younger noticed the loving eyes of his boyfriend on him, full attention focused on _him._

chan was one of a kind boyfriend. he was the picture perfect boy everyone would hit on but he never acknowledged it. beside his pretty looking face and muscular body, he was sweet, generous and funny and there wasn’t a moment when he would raise his voice at minho nor even try to argue. sex with him was also flawless; chan always cared about his partner first and all of his needs. maybe that’s why it was so hard for minho to move on.

“i’m thinking of getting a lobster” minho responded after a while looking up from the menu card and seeing his boyfriend smile.

“i’m gonna get the same then”.

after the waiter took their order minho found himself drifting off to the soothing sound of christmas songs sung by the band next to them. he felt a hand on his own and looking up at chan he thought he saw an angel. chan’s eyes were full of sparkles like a night sky on a hot summer day and his smile was growing bigger and bigger with each second of staring at each other. and just like that chan started singing.

“santa baby, a '54 convertible too convertible too light blue, i’ll wait up for you dear” his singing was just above the whisper but minho could still hear it clearly. “santa baby…”

“so hurry up the chimney tonight” he finished the line and just seconds after they both bursted out in giggles holding hands like little kids. that was what minho loved about christmas the most. feeling free and childish all over again. and the warm hand intertwining fingers with his own was what made it feel like that.

they continued singing songs along with the band and smiling at each other until the waiter brought their food.

they were eating and chitchating along, it was natural for them after such a long time of dating. the dinner went really smoothly and chan managed to sing a few more songs on the way. when they were finished and minho checked up his phone to see that he’s almost late for the family dinner he grunted and his boyfriend immediately paid his full attention to him.

“what’s wrong minmin?” he asked, a fear in his eyes “are you late?”

minho felt like his heart was going to burst out and broke in million pieces when the thought of leaving chan alone on christmas eve stuck in his head. they were already dating for so long; starting out with the start of university and celebrating all the memorable things together, having all the ups and downs of minho career shared. he was finally starting to get acknowledged in the cinematic industry and had already signed a few contracts for movies for the next year. he also knew his lifestyle wasn’t the one his easy boyfriend chan would love to have; he was a simple, carefree man with a passion to music and his antics shop and -as many wound have anticipated that - in minho’s opinion his history major degree was something beyond being sexy.

he loved chan, there wasn’t a word that he didn’t; but minho also had his long awaited goal that was now in the reach of his both hands and he didn’t know if he was able to manage a dream coming true and a dream like partner together.

minho and chan got to know each other by a total accident; the younger was in need of some props for the uni play and he happened to find the shop chan owned. it was like a destiny kiss - they fell for each other the moment their gazes met and not long after minho invited chan to see the play he was preparing for. it wasn’t intended but the night ended up heated with them all over each other in the backseat of chan’s old car. at least that’s how minho remembered it.

“minho?” he was snapped from his thoughts by a warm hand on his thigh and he shook his head reminding himself of the current. 

“i’m not late, i’m gonna be just on time” he reassured giving a squeeze to chan’s hand on his thigh.

just at that time the waiter arrived at their table and before minho could move chan had already taken out his wallet and gave the proper amount of money what left younger in shook. it was a common knowledge that he wasn’t wealthy and minho, on the other hand, was a kid from a rich family basically always living on high level, even without the fame or job.

“chan!” minho scolded a little bit too loud hitting his arm. “it was supposed to be my treat” he whined tugging at older’s arm when they moved up and started dressing up to leave.

“it’s okay baby” chan only responded with the same sweet smile. “i wanted to treat you right” he added quietly but minho didn’t fail to hear it.

as always though, minho said nothing. during these three years he learnt to act as he ignores those actions of chan; learnt to not push his buttons when it comes to him cause he knew there is no way he could win and they weren’t the type of couple to argue a lot. in fact, they never really argued at all and minho would get frustrated at how _perfect_ his boyfriend can be.

  
  


“i wish i could take you with me” minho whined once they were inside, standing on the same parking lot as only a few hours ago, taking both of chan’s hands in his own and shaking them together. they were dating for three years already but still younger haven’t introduced his boyfriend to the family.

“it’s okay minmin” chan only smiled in response but the hurt in his eyes didn’t go away for a few seconds. “i understand” he added cuddling up to his boyfriend and placing his chin on top of his shoulder. “just have fun with your family before you’re famous” minho couldn’t see but he knew chan has a typical grin on his face. he was so supportive of him and his career that the younger really felt bad about it. minho couldn’t provide the love and support chan was always giving him. “my pretty talented boyfriend” he continued babbling. “he’s gonna take the stages and everyone’s hearts” they were standing like that, cuddled up to each other with chan’s chin on minho’s shoulder and his hands gripping tightly on actor’s waist.

“channie” minho whined after a while and every word he spoke made him hate himself a little bit more with each second. “i really have to go now…”

“ah right” the older spoke raising his head and loosening his grip making minho shiver when the cold, december air hit him. “have fun baby” chan poked minho’s lips cutely and smiled at him. “love you” and just like that minho turned around and disappeared in his car leaving his boyfriend alone on a christmas eve day.

—————————

they haven’t seen each other in almost a year, however in minho’s eyes chan was exactly the same. his skin was the same shiny bright shade and his hair was still dark and curly, even his glowing eyes didn’t change a bit.

both were paralyzed as time was passing by and more and more people shown up at the mall pushing everyone around only to get inside.

suddenly, minho heard someone shouting his name and that was like a bucket of cold water on his head reminding him that now he’s never truly safe in public and there’s nothing like privacy in his life anymore.

he didn’t even realize the pull on his arm and the next thing he acknowledged was a well known old car, chan’s baby per say and the common smell of his favorite mint air freshener around him. all of his shopping bags ended up on the car’s floor, as well as his body when chan pulled up from the parking and sped up through the city streets into the darkness.

minho didn’t know if he was relieved or screwed.

——————

it was a few weeks into the new year when minho received a call about a new manager, for the first time his personal one. he obviously was incredibly happy and couldn’t keep his high down as he entered their shared apartment.

it was about six in the morning; minho stayed on plan for longer to refilm a few scenes and see the finishing touches to them also giving his opinion on some of the movie’s aspects. he was getting better and better with each role - at least that’s what the newspapers and the internet has been talking about him for the few last weeks.

minho paid more attention to what he was wearing and how he was acting outside, creating a proper identity for the lee minho from a new mag cover; “a charming and cherished man in power of woman’s hearts; a man of many talents” - that was what they had said.

he jumped around the house looking for his boyfriend and surprisingly finding him not in his bed, as supposed, but in the kitchen, wrapped in a warm blanket and sipping a hot cocoa from his favorite cup.

“oh channie” minho whispered crossing the distance between them and instantly hugging to the older’s body. he felt so warm and comfortable just by being close to his significant other. “why aren’t you asleep?” 

“was waiting for you” chan answered and yawned right after. his eyes were puffy and his face looked tired but he stayed strong pretending like everything was alright. “you never texted me back so i started worrying” he mumbled then, hiding his face in minho’s neck and leaving a sloppy kiss there.

“oh channie” younger whined again stroking older’s back. “aren’t you going to the work at nine?” 

chan only nodded too tired to form a sentence, beside the crook of minho’s neck was too warm and too welcoming to give up on it.

“come cuddle with me in bed” actor said after a while and he ended up being carried there beside his numerous protests.

they fell on their huge bed together; a wild and expensive possession; king size bed with minho’s imagined amount of pillows being twelve and a warm fuzzy blanket beside the classic duvet.

he immediately digged himself in the blanket bringing chan’s body close enough to spoon with him, making the older the little spoon this time.

“how was work?” chan asked playing with minho’s fingers around his waist and bringing them to his lips to kiss each knuckle. however, before minho could have answered, he has already dozed off to sleep.

from then on, minho’s career was only doing better and better.

——————

chan pulled off from the road just next to minho (and his in fact) apartment looking in a real view mirror back at the younger male.

“sorry for doing…. that” he somehow shrugged, an awkwardness noticeable in his voice. “if you wish i’ll drive back for your car and then…”

“no” minho cut in, gripping on chan’s hand. “it’s christmas eve so i should spend it with the person i love” he said slowly. “so would you accompany me?” the nervousness bit in in his words. it has been almost a year and chan could be dating anyone by now so when he heard a positive response he thought it was a lucky strike.

once inside their before shared apartment, they both felt even more awkward and out of place than before.

they parted ways in a pretty weird way; actually without a word; so all of chan’s things that were there also stayed there because minho didn’t plan on throwing anything of this out.

“should we order a take out?” younger asked and chan already took out his phone.

“will get the spicy ramen” he said and minho smiled at that cause even now he was the first thing chan thought of.

only about 15 minutes later they both were seated on the opposite sides of couch with cups of tea on the coffee table between them and packets of food in their hands.

“i missed you” minho was the first to spoke, raising his head from the food and looking at older.

“i’m sorry” he got in response and guilt was the only thing that minho heard. “i should have thought about the both of us then” chan chuckled stuffing his cheeks with noodles to avoid speaking more.

“i’m the one who’s sorry” minho’s voice was just above the whisper. “i tried to find you, tried to contact you but there was nothing…”

“i moved back to australia for a bit” chan cut in looking straight into minho’s eyes. “i was acting childish but what other to expect from me?” 

“stop being sarcastic channie” and just like that they fell into the awkward silence all over again.

——————

fast enough, minho had discovered that having a manager is totally different from what he thought it was. first off, his manager was a total dick and listening to him only made minho’s head spin with irritation. minho understood it was for the best of his career but adding his personal life to his success was none of his workmates’ business.

they were on a plan filming a few more romantic scenes and the only word minho could mumble now was exhausted. beside numerous cuts and retakes, the actress that played in the movie too was constantly hitting on him, not giving even a spare second of break.

the last scene they were filming for that day was a kiss scene and minho couldn’t feel anymore disgusted as to kissing someone who wasn’t his significant other. although, a role was a role and this one was a big one.

when they heard the cut minho immediately untangled his body from the woman’s one and moved only to spot his boyfriend in the back and freeze. was he there for the most of time? minho thought as he entered the changing room and changed as fast as possible, leaving his work place and meeting chan at the front door.

“hi” older chimmed giving him a sloppy kiss and giggling into it. “thought you’d need a proper kiss after this weird heterosexual act” he laughed and brought minho’s hand in his intertwining their fingers together and walking out of the building.

“didn’t it bother you?” minho asked quietly as they entered the car. chan’s hand immediately found it’s way to younger thigh and massaged it lightly.

“it’s your job” he answered genuinely. “and i’m your boyfriend and i trust you” minho pouted at him and stole a quick peck on his cheek.

“i love you” he whispered earning the same response back.

———————

minho groaned after putting back the empty food containers on the table. he remembered how chan always used to rub his tummy every time he whined about being full and that memory brought a smile on his face.

“how have you been?” older asked and brought minho to reality reminding him that things are different now. he stared back at chan noticing how little changed about him. the same puffy pink lips and full of light eyes; the same muscular body and as always all black outfit. minho dared to say he didn’t change at all.

“why did you leave?” minho asked instead causing the older to shrug uncomfortably. he didn’t know how he could have stayed that calm - every time he thought about finally meeting chan left him with tears of frustration or screaming uncontrollably. those past months were hard to proceed, hard to stand all alone by himself but minho couldn’t blame chan for that and he was aware of it. he couldn’t just live his own dream to come back home every night to the warm arms and his in fact secret lover who sacrificed everything for him. that was egoistic and now minho grew to understand it.

however, the pain from chan’s leave was still there and it made his eyes water in only a few seconds.

“i wanted you to be free and happy” chan mumbled taking minho’s hand from his lap to his own and playing with his fingers. “as you are now” he continued standing up and kneeing in front of minho’s scrunched figure.

“m not” minho sniffed freeing his hands from chan’s hold and hiding his face in them. “you are my happiness” he cried out.

“i’m sorry for everything…” he rubbed minho’s sides in comforting way but it didn’t stop the younger from crying even more.

it blown out on him, all of his precious memories, everything that happened during the three years of dating, everything that he lost on the way to get where he was now, as a quite famous actor with his life all figured out.

with his days being busy he didn’t quite notice the obvious loss, but every night trying to fall asleep on his own made him earn a lot of sleepless nights during the year.

chan was his ground but when he disappeared minho didn’t know how to normally get up.

“can you kiss me?” his words shook the silence around them and at first he froze not knowing how chan would react. however, his worries disappeared fast as he felt two warm hands on his own taking them away from his face and only seconds after a pair of plump lips landed on his making his whole body shiver.

——————

it has been only a week or two since him and his manager started working together and minho was already pissed off at his behavior.

they were both at home, preparing to go to sleep when the younger got a call, although he could have already guessed what it would be about.

it being his manager’s obsession of minho breaking up with his boyfriend and dating a famous actress for the best of his reputation.

minho could agree that newspapers started shaming on him; on both his no dating rumors and his sexuality which for them already seemed sketchy just because he wasn’t going out with any popular girl but it didn’t mean he was going to break up with his boyfriend to make the audience happy.

unfortunately, the staff didn’t seem to get it and the frustrated call minho received was what only proved him truth.

“you have to break up with your artificial boy next door boyfriend” was what he heard first after answering and it made his blood boid. no matter how many times he spoke to them they never listened.

“i’m not breaking up with chan” he answered greeting his teeth. he was ready for everything but not for the thing he heard next.

“we will terminate your contract if you won’t be single tomorrow” just like that the call ended and minho didn’t even notice when he burst down in tears, only chan’s figure coming up to him from the bathroom and taking his weak body into his hands.

he scooped him up to bed and wrapped their bodies with multiple blankets hugging minho close to his chest. he fell asleep to the beat of his boyfriend’s heart.

  
  
  


when minho woke up he couldn’t feel anything beside him and his body felt suddenly cold. an unknown fear raised in his head but as soon as it arrived, it also disappeared making him even more confused.

he looked around and the first thing he noticed was a note sticked to his phone’s screen with chan’s handwriting on it.

“hi minho. 

i’m sorry but i eavesdropped something yesterday……

i can’t do it and i know i will be never accepted as a person you love… well im not doubting your feelings for me but i know you can find someone way better and someone who will suit your career. im sorry it took me so long to realize.

im sorry 

i love you, i always will.

because without the fanciness, you made me feel special.”

and like that minho’s eyes got wet again, his whole body trembling.

“channie?” he asked with a shaky voice but silence was the only answer.

minho could have sworn he also heard his heart breaking in pieces. 

————————

when they parted the only thing minho had in his head was chan and the way he kissed; always so carefully and lovingly. they were both panting; their gentle kiss turned out into a heated makeout session and none of them knew how did it happen.

“i… i love you” minho panted hugging chan close.

“minho… i love you too” the words hit his ear and younger could sworn he felt butterflies in his stomach like a little girl. “don’t you have a family dinner in a few though?”

he shook his head kissing chan again “not important” he was mumbling between kisses “you’re important. can you be my boyfriend again?” he asked and the kiss he got next was enough of an answer.

———————-

minho was woken up by a soft hand massaging his hip and he immediately moved closer to the warmth of other body.

“minmin baby wake up” chan sing sung stroking his back now. “it’s time for the morning news” he teased and younger knew that he’s smiling even when he couldn’t see his face.

minho opened his eyes and he was welcomed with a pair of loving ones staring at him and at this moment he could have sworn he felt like the most important person on the world. him and chan established a few things the night before after minho shut down his phone because of the non stopping calls from his parents surely mad about his absence. they agreed to try again, both crying their eyes out while minho was promising to pay more attention to chan from now on.

“turn on the news channie” he smiled and reached for his boyfriend’s hand while the said boy used his other hand to turn on the tv. 

on a screen appeared a young woman, a well known journalist to the both of them and they both heard “lee minho, well known korean actor confessed he’s homosexual and he has been actually dating someone for a longer time. ‘we are happy and that’s what is important’ he tweeted just after the interview we had with him the day before. it was pretty simple to connect the dots together. we wish mr lee and his boyfriend well, merry christmas everyone”.

at the time the news reporter disappeared from the screen and the program changed for some weather forecast minho heard his phone blowing up with messages and e-mails. however, he didn’t bother checking them up as his boyfriend rested his chin on top of his shoulder and smiled against his neck blowing warm air on it.

“we’re happy and that’s what is important” he quoted himself and smiled widely, the situation finally hitting him. “i love you channie” he whispered feeling how chan is smiling against his neck again. “merry christmas love”.

and like that they didn’t care about a massive spam of calls from minho’s family cause they finally had each other.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading!!  
> please leave kudos and comments if you liked it!!


End file.
